Yes, you read right...I DID finish! Official time was 4:01:41 for 0.62 mile swim, 25 mile bike, and 6.2 mile run. Not fast by far, but under my anticipated time of 4:30:00 which I anticipated. Plagued by emotional and physical pain, I am proud of this achievement, proud not to have given up and persevered.
Saturday 04/30/2011... Another pre-dawn drive to The Pier for practice swim and the days pre-race events. Distracted by nerves, I am racing down the expressway and get stopped by an officer! Thankfully, the officer is kind and lets me off with a stern warning...likely seeing my distress. We arrive at The Pier to find warm but very choppy waters. Worried faces from other competitors stare out across the ocean wondering, will we make the cut, will we get out of this unscathed? I don my swim cap, goggles and head in without my wetsuit to test the waters. Thrown to and fro, I make my way to about 1/10 of what the swim will be tomorrow. My nerves are tested, but I was able to make it in the frothy waters despite the lack of wetsuit which will likely be illegal in the warm waters on race day. Coach has some last minute advice and off we go to check into the hotel.
Kudos to the Vinoy, who were overwhelmed with a new breed of guest, the triathlete, gear, bike in tow..dressed in a soggy, seaweed laden tri-suit at check-in who had rooms ready for all of us at the wee hours of the morning.
After cleaning up...off to pick-up our packets, bike check-in, and pre-race expo SHOPPING! Yeah!
I find myself 2 tri-suits and assorted other goodies..lots of fun and great company to dissipate some pre-race jitters.
I worry though as my left knee (previously injured in an SUV rollover with severe OA now and mild PCL instability), begins to hurt and buckle when I put weight on it. Rest and medications overnight...and lots of praying it will be fine in the morning.
Pre-dawn 05/01/2011 - RACE DAY!
And so it begins, we gather in the lobby for a pre-race Mission Moment. My team honors me in allowing me to offer my patients wisdom, well wishes and luck as we move forward to finally finish what we have all worked so hard to achieve. My anticipation is bittersweet tho, as my best friend and training partner has to pull out of the race due to a illness. I am proud of him for knowing his limits...he would have really been hurting had he tried to run the race so sick! Instead, he pushed his feelings aside and began coaching the TNT girls: making sure our Transition areas were complete, giving us final words of wisdom, lifting our spirits, and tell us we WOULD DO THIS! How much I owe him for centering me in these moments!
THE SWIM... 0.62 miles in 00:32:57
After watching the pros, elite amatuers, and age groupers go off..it is finally TNTs moment. We go through the corral and the horn blows. I run as hard as I can through the beach and into the water in the middle of the wave. My heart rate climbs...above 190, hitting 200, chest tightens..and breathing becomes difficult. I have pushed myself too hard. I dive into the water and panic sets in. Somehow I calm myself down and side stroke my way to the second buoy. Pushed to an fro by choppy water and other swimmers I make it through the swim...only going off course once (and managed to miss the kayakers paddle this time..LOL).
THE BIKE... 25 miles in 1:39:01
A brisk, barefoot jog on sidewalk to the transition area and on the bike I am. Cobblestone, horrid headwinds off the ocean, and a course open to cars and pedestrians await. I make it through only going off course twice, once my own fault for hunkering down against a headwind an missing a turn and another for watching an officer wave a car behind me to turn and I following his commands instead of going forward. Around mile 20 I begin to feel the pangs in my left knee resume and now my right calf is tight ball as the cramps set in. I have been hydrating I tell myself...drink more..drink more...it is never enough. At bike dismount, I feel it...but I see my training partner, John, waiting for me by the run start, encouraging me to go on. And so I do.
THE RUN.. (or walk I should say, 6.2 miles in 1:33:20)
Now 2/3 of the way done, I begin to falter. My left knee is giving me a sharp shooting pain with every step. My right quadricep is a ball of knots I cannot smooth out. I push forward, power-walking at the encouragement of everyone on the sidelines. The heat of the day is beating down on my shoulders, all I want to do is sit down underneath one of those very appealing trees. A TNT coach comes to my side, he asks me to sit it out...I refuse. If I sit down now, I am NOT getting up. I am going to WALK the race if I have to. I take it slow, 4 MPH, hydrating, taking my gels, splashing ice water on my knee at every water station.
I meet up with a fellow TNTer from Virginia. She is exhausted, nauseated and unable to run. We walk side by side, talking, hurting, pushing ourselves to the next water station. Somehow we make it to mile 3. I find my 30th wind...and begin 1 minute splits of jog/walk and make the push. I see my friends, Kate, Ernesto, Mindy, and Bill...encouragement through and through. Finally, I round the corner...and see The Pier. I am almost there. Coach sprints with me the last way...my left knee dragging, my right leg sore. But I finish...I cross the finish line and hear the cheers and it is done. I did it.
All the emotions flooded through my mind and body. Thank you again to my training partner, who was there to pick up the pieces and put me back together again.
Endurance is a special word to me now. I know I can endure, no matter what. The training helped my body, helped the muscles learn what they needed to do...but my mind pulled me through each time I wanted to quit. I am proud of this. Proud of the mental fortitude and physical strength I can achieve.
No one can take that away, not the indifference I went back to at work, not the comments about having holocaust numbers written across my arm (race markings), or jeers about my slow times.
I endured. I trained. I mattered.
You did outstanding and I was very proud of you and your effort. You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for .... and you ALWAYS matter.
ReplyDeleteI was impressed reading this blog. You have great determination to make your life better. I just wish it had a different name. The term "gimp" may be offensive to some. I have a friend with a quad brother and quad fiance, and they participate in rugby, wheelchair games, etc. and I think some of your messages would be great to share, but not everyone in this world has a sense of humor. As a doctor, it is evident you care about people, so please think about maybe an explanation on the "gimp" term or rebranding your blog. Keep up the good work.
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